I have always liked this Zulu greeting – it means ‘we see you’ and is used in the same way we might offer ‘how do you do’.
You might observe that there is little difference in our greeting but this Zulu acknowledgement seems to understand human nature a little more.
It is a profound and deep need of the human existence to be seen, to be heard. Is there anything more frustrating than feeling you have not been heard, seen or noticed?
For many of us, being seen and heard by just our nearest and dearest is enough to make us tick along quite nicely but the majority of us do thrive if we are acknowledged by those we work with on the regular basis. Being respected by those we respect is hugely important to our self-worth and when it is missing or gone because we are not in a good working environment, or indeed just not in a working environment we struggle.
I use the term work, but this does not need to mean paid employment but it does need to be something that uses your skills and abilities.
And this is why when a person is out of work for no good reason they can begin to feel very down and naturally withdrawn from life. They feel like no one can see them must less hear them. And therein lies the biggest danger.
So often we turn these anxieties over in our heads not sharing them with anyone. Perhaps we feel we are the only ones feeling like this; good grief I must just get a grip; if I say anything people will think I am weak/pathetic/unneeded. I will be seen for all the wrong reasons!
And of course the worst possible frame of mind to be in when we go for a new job, promotion or set out a business idea is one of desperation. It seems to seep out of us no matter what we do and sadly it is a reality that desperation makes other people feel anxious and they will want to get away from us, and quickly.
And so the circle goes around.
Of course, there is no need for this. A meaningful conversation, of support or a proverbial kick up the pants often helps us. Some tough love, if you will, makes a huge difference.
I am often left with the question why on earth do we all seem to feel we must do things alone? That we should have all the answers?
And so reach out and take action. We often talk about waiting for our boat to come in, hoping something will come along and we will be saved.
It rarely does and so you really do need to swim out to meet that boat.
If you are planning a change of job in the next year than get ahead. Make sure you are not left feeling alone; and please do not for a minute consider that – that won’t happen to me’ – because it really does happen to people like you.
If you are in that stuck state now, take action as a matter of urgency.
At the very least in the PiPS group sign up for the lunch on 3rd October if you can be in London –
If not you can drop us a note to say where you would like the next event to take place.
Get in touch, get support, get information and get moving. Time is a wasting
Angela Hackett on behalf of the PiPS Team